Apparently the anti-depressants take a couple weeks to kick in, so I’m going to rant a bit.
- If you write a long winded blog post, separate the fucking thing with paragraphs or I’m not reading it!
- Nobody cares about pictures of your kids on Facebook. I just added you because you were hot back in high school and I want to see if you’re still hot today!
- Continuing with the Facebook rants, quit posting stupid quotes that you ripped off some website as your status updates. Status updates should be for ranting, telling me how shitty your work day was, and, in some cases, how good of a bowel movement you may have had.
- I got ripped off today. I was patiently waiting on The Price is Right to come on, when I stumbled across Benny Hinn on the television. I sit and watched the show only to find out he wouldn’t be smacking people in the head and making them walk again. I watched for no more than 5 minutes and was asked for money 4 times. I’m in the wrong business.
- Old people and their cheap ways tilt me to no end. My parents are included in this rant. So evidently $0.50 or whatever it costs is too much for a newspaper, so they share with the neighbor. Yep. Sad. Anyway, I’m taking my pre-Price is Right shit the other day, relaxing, letting things flow smoothly, when I heard a knock at the door. I yell out the window “Just a minute!” and have to cut my nice shit short. As I’m stumbling out the bathroom, pulling up my pants the neighbor is just taking it upon himself to come the fuck on in the house. My parents weren’t going to be home for another 6 hours. Leave the fucking newspaper on the front porch and let me shit in peace! I had to go back for round 2 and I was on shit tilt for the entire episode of The Price is Right.
- Speaking of The Price is Right. I love that show. Drew Carey kills it. What I really want to know is where the hell do they find a TV that costs $5000+?!!? Does this thing cook breakfast and give blowjobs too?
- My 2nd favorite game show is Family Feud. I love the old episodes with Richard Dawson because he basically molests every female on the show and they love it. Dude is a stud. Since then the hosts of that game show have grown progressively worse. You have Al from Home Improvement. Louie Anderson or whatever his name is. Elaine from Seinfeld’s boss. And now the most brilliant move of all…coming soon… STEVE FUCKING HARVEY. Seriously?
- Let’s finish off with a non-rant. I love the new game show Downfall. Chris Jericho could go down as the greatest game show host of all time. I just wish he would do it as his Y2J wrestling persona. Don’t get me started with the retarded contestants on this show though….this would turn into a rant.
- I’m addicted to game shows. FML
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